HowToBeAsAwesomeAsPants

• Use an email client that doesn't break threading.
• Turn off the receiver.
• Give up your GUI.
• Watch it in 1080p.
• Subscribe to every mailing list.
• Never use public file sharing services.
• Use periods at the end of list items.
• Exhibit mild alcoholism.
  • Mild?
• Put it in McSwiggen's nose.
• Have at least 4 jobs at any given time.
• Register for no fewer than 18 credits, 12 of which are technical.
• Spend at least half of your income on hard drives.
• Never throw up in public.
• Disregard mentors, light hands on fire.
• Make love to the louch so vigorously that it needs to be replaced.
• Choose a frosh to take under your wing. Be sure to beat them thoroughly.
• Accidentally have sex ten times in one day.
• Disable USB ports, webcam, audio interface, etc. in BIOS.
• Use your SSD-endowed laptop as a bludgeoning and projectile weapon
• Never sleep in the lounge.
• Do not accept A- grade offers.
• Proposition your friend's parents for the watching of porn.
• Act like an asshole to everyone.
  • Clearly you just haven't entered my exclusive inner circle -- PaNts
• Consume ~2 liters of tea, coffee, or some combination of both each weekday.
• Register for CS Colloquium for the sole purpose of making your [schedule] more symmetric.
• Edit FunWiki in vim.