Editing EyeOfChaos/BoardQuotes
'''BoardQuote Archive''' '''[[EyeOfChaos/ChapterOne | Chapter 1]]''' ''Joseph, if you shoot anybody, I'll flunk you!'' -- Professor Amundsen ''But They're going to kill me!'' -- Joseph ''Then I'll flunk Them too!'' -- Professor Amundsen ''I certainly wasn't expecting anything abnormal, like . . . cats . . .'' -- David Magus Knight Julie: ''Large as in large, or large as in "holy crap"?'' Steph: ''Large as in "holy crap".'' Julie: ''Holy crap!'' ''Is that a raven in your pants, or are you just glad to see me?'' -- StephGrush ''Trogdor the Burninator thinks I'm Keanu Reeves?'' --JulieWortman Will: "All in all, not bad for a first effort." I shake his hand. Steph: Oh my god! ''(rolls dice)'' . . . Oh my '''god'''! Will: . . . can I disbelieve? Steph: You can '''try''' . . . DM: "The deer piss glows faintly at you." Eli: "Well then... if you want the deer piss to glow faintly at you... I am not a man to come between you and your deer piss." Steve: "No, you are a koala headed, seraph winged piece of furniture to come between me and my deer piss." DM: "He's not responsive." Steve: "Like the previous case? The lights are off and nobody's home?" DM: "More like the light's are on, but he's in another part of the house right now." Lori: "Amundsen's starting to talk like Meredith, because--" Clay: "Because she hates him?" Lori: ".....Yes." Eli: "I will be talking to either, or both, or at least one of-- wait a second." ''[Professor Meredith and Coach Rett decide that they don't appreciate Dr. Evans' methods'' '' of treating traumatized college students. They each take one of his shoulders.]'' Rett: What are you doing to him? Evans: I'm a doctor; trust me. Rett: Explanation, or Door. Evans: I'm a ''doctor''; ''trust'' me! ''[Meredith and Rett exchange a glance. Dr. Evans gets "Door".]'' Evans: You're going to kill him . . . ''[As colander comes off of patient's head, patient begins speaking in tongues. Meredith'' '' and Rett decide that "Door" may be a bit premature . . .]'' ''[Edward Reid has just drawn a connection between current events and a set of obscure artifacts'' '' dedicated to Greek gods.]'' Meredith (to Amundsen): You see, Professor, there's my case for putting Classics back in the Core. Eli: The next time a psychotic road gopher shows up, we'll greet it with a ''salad''. Clay: Will, stop trying to create Wiki quotes! Julie [on the Primal]: ...Carl Jung and all his hos? Cylene: So Meredith cast a ''magic'' spell on Evans' dreams, so that a ''magic'' chair with ''magic'' wings and a ''magic'' bear head would show up in them. Amundsen: And a powerpoint presentation. Cylene: I don't think the powerpoint presentation was magic. Meredith: I will need your help in...scaring my cat. Julie: I just have this mental image of John Kerry leaping into Kramer's head... Meredith: This is Epistemology. Ethics is two doors down. RichardGarfinkel (while sitting in on a session): Wait, is this EyeOfChaos or Schmack? Amundsen: Presumably we don't get $9.99 off our next purchase from the Cult of the Serpent if we redeem this guy! Meredith: Are they [the Cult of the Serpent] more or less powerful than -- Cylene: -- a breadbox? Meredith: -- the State of Illinois? Amundsen: We need to nip this thing in the bud! Reid: Show me the bud, then, and I will nip it! Cylene: Wait, you mean Athens ''isn't'' an ordinary college town? Reid: My ''dear'' girl . . . Someone I can't remember, OOC: Do you actually ''say'' that?! Clay: Yeah, I do . . . Julie: I smirk. Amundsen: Professor Meredith, what exactly are you hiding? You seem unusually... ''polite''. Steph: "Mmm, tastes like Cthulhu!" Will: "Insanely delicious!" Meredith: Ms. Richards, please stop trying to mess with our professional paranoid. ''Edward Reid has just survived being mauled by a giant serpent. Amundsen is not happy.'' Jeff the Serpent Mage: It was his test to make. Amundsen: And if I'd have stabbed it? Whose test would it have been ''then''? Rett ''(quietly)'': Just along for the ride . . . ''Regarding Amundsen and Rett, OOC:'' ''She's'' a paranoid; ''He's'' a swim coach. Together, they ''fight crime''! Julie: Let's do the Mind Rape again... Serpent: I hope never to face you in single combat, mindspeaker; I would also not want to be around when you are buying shoes. Lori: It starts with an ''A'', and ends in ''Pocalypse''. Apparently 'Meredith' is a verb meaning 'to exploit.' See also: EyeOfChaos/OdysseyOfSquirrels '''Chapter 2''' Lori: I'm trying to devise a thing so that I can put more than one squirrel in a tupperware. ** Lori doesn't think this is funny, but it helps to imagine the intro to Aladdin when you read this quote. ''Discussing the relative snakeness or human-ness of the aforementioned'' ''giant serpent, a shapeshifter:'' Rett: I mean, would her [snake] children be able to change into human form? Angela the Serpent Mage: Most likely not. She would need to find a human male . . . ''(beat)'' I'm not entirely sure how that would work. ''(beat)'' I don't think I'd want to ''see'' that. ''The party's host in the Astral Plane (JeffBrenion), unaware of the meaning of the term "Dojo," is'' ''convinced that Coach Rett runs a brothel.'' Rett: Sir, I believe we may have a misunderstanding here. The arts I refer to are Martial. Host: ''(stunned pause)'' Your people use that for '''War?!''' ''. . . you know, a few more memorable quotes from the session and it might be worth it to make'' ''a EyeOfChaos/MartialOrMarital node. --WillShipley'' Emissary: So, five mages walk into the City . . . Umi (as Rett): . . . Ouch. Emissary ''(chuckling)'': For the mages, or the City? Umi: Well, I suppose that depends on your skill as a guide . . . Emissary: I think it rather depends whether you follow my guidance. "Or, she could just politely turn down their offers, and introduce them to her roommate, the high elven lady Mary Suethor." -- LoriThomas "Please don't take too many trout. The water will go extinct." -- EliBogart ''OOC commentary:'' "Mommy, where do bricks come from?" "You see, child, mortals throw them into the air . . ." Julie: "Our goal is to Redeem the Lord of Night . . . possibly in the Unreal Tournament sense." "No convenient identifiers? No ID cards? No personal effects?" -- EliBogart "No diary entries trailing off in 'aaargh?'" -- ClayHambrick ''Potential titles for Reid's memoirs'' * My Diary * My Unexpected but not Unprophesied Journey * There and back again: A Necromancer's Tale * Adventures of Five Humans, Several Squirrels, and a Cat * The Tale of the Amber Dawn, compiled by Edward Reid from his Own Observations and the Accounts of his Friends * What We Did in the Fourth Nightmare War * <B>The Downfall of the Lord of Night and the Return of House Vassen.</B> ''Professor Meredith is being tortured.'' Dr. Matison: Tell me, Professor . . . what is your sexual orientation? Meredith: I assure you, it is nothing that encompasses you. ''Amundsen checks if a party mind-link is secure from eavesdropping:'' Amundsen: Volen, are you there? . . . Volen, come quickly! The great goobly ooze is back and it's coming to get us! Cylene: Would you ''stop'' that?! Rett: I may have a college education, Joan, but I'm not dumb. Lori, describing Amundsen's actions on AIM: ''basically I shout things and taser people'' '''[[EyeOfChaos/AprilOneUniverse | April 1 Universe]]''' WillShipley: "The jade cat statuette???" ''For a moment, a look of panic crosses Nolorian's face . . .'' Julie: "The salmon???" Lori: "A light mauve." LoriThomas: "The Eye of Chaos???" "Actually an ear." Julie: "This dagger is missing something..." All: "A '''''squirrel!'''''" "We put the 'Naughty' in 'Illuminati!'" JulieWortman: "The Lead Green Dude???" "Actually blue." (see FuzzyBlueThing, possibly)
Summary:
This change is a minor edit.
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