IamTheVeryModelOfaHarveyMuddProfessional

A FilkSong by ZachWalters, based on Gilbert and Sullivan's "I am the Very Model of a Modern Major General" [[1]

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 I am the very model of a Harvey Mudd professional.
 I have a great obsession which lies in the small and technical.
 My love was engineering, both the civil and electrical:
 But then I took E54 and saw it wasn't practical.

 I started out in physics but then rhinos stopped attracting me.
 I took CS and now I yearn to burn Bill Gates in effigy.
 My friends mistook my sickly, ghostly pallor for a powdered mime.
 And I discovered what a simple bug can do to running time. 

 As fall wore on I started to love unis more than bicycles.
 My newfound ScrippSie GirlFriend was as frigid as an icicle.
 And I knew that even Jupiter inside his mighty pantheon
 Could never overcome a ratio of nearly pi to one.

 I cowed my Hum professor with my webs of cunning sophistry
 I took the lectures as a chance to up my nodding off-istry
 I knew not of the difference 'twixt Diderot and Sophocles
 And learned that pass or fail is not a prop but a necessity.

 And when you see I think that Western culture is a heavy load
 And when I think that laundry's an offense against the honor code
 And when my interests capture me and I become obsessional
 You'll see I am the model of a Harvey Mudd professional.