[Home]NickJohnson

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 Graduate '02: HypercubeSuite, ChessersSuite, CrackHall
 Currently: graduate student at the UniversityOfChicago
 RoomMate: MicahSmukler both of them should frequently be told to GoToBed?, ArielBarton
 E-mail: naj@uchicago.edu
 AIM: Squirrelloid
 LJ: Squirrelloid
 Activities: SwingDancing, RolePlaying, ComputerGames?, BoardGames, Bridge, PoeTry
 Scientific Interests: PalaeoEcology?, MacroEcology?, BioGeography?, TheoreticalEcology?,
  statistics, MacroEvolution?, bias analysis, Morphological Disparity
 Professional: Paper in Evolution (McClain?, Johnson, and Rex. 2004), Paper in Feb's American Naturalist (Rex et al. 2005), + more!
 Quote of the moment: Die DDIG Die!!!

Its been over 4 years since i graduated. Thats kind of scary. Definitely an AncientMyth. This page doesn't exist, you didn't read this.


 PuzzlePirates! (Yar!)

 Ocean: Viridian
 Character: Momarette
 Home Port: Tigerleaf

 Captain (Siren) of Follow Your Heart 
 Princess of the Flag Imperial Coalition

 Stats: (Ocean // Archipelago)
 Swordfighting: Solid (Grandmaster // Legendary)
 Bilging: Weighty (Ultimate)
 Sailing: Weighty (Legendary // Ultimate)
 Navigating: Paragon (Ultimate // Legendary)
 Gunnery: Expert (Ultimate)
 Carpentry: Expert (Ultimate)

 Sea Battle: Paragon (Legendary // Ultimate)

 Alchemy: Solid (Renowned // Grandmaster)
 Distilling: Narrow (Distinguished)
 Shipwrightery: Weighty (Ultimate)

 Drinking: Broad (Legendary)
 Hearts/Spades? - who cares?
 Treasure Drop: Narrow (Master)
 Poker: Solid (Renowned)

 Wielding: Falchion (Red/Yellow?)
 Ships: Sloop Well-Known Sunfish (Sloop), Pretty Salmon (WB), Heartless Angler (sloop), 
  Annoying Blowfish (WB), Sophisticated Lady (WB), Dedicated Sailfish (WB), 
  Flexible Roach (WB), Reserved Sunfish (WF), Modest Sunfish (MB)
 Trinkets: Skull x20 or so, Fruitcake, Intestines (darned sucky teammates), Rose, 
 Map Percentage: 100% (Globe)


Old page (kept because it has some flavor, and links i like):

Paranoid EastDorm alumnus once known to stay up all night with PreFrosh (to further their CrackAddiction?) to the neglect of his homework. Fortunately, he has the entire SquirrelArmy behind him as the Squirrelloid, and so can mobilize his forces to, at the least, get an extension?.... TheDevil. Plays DungeonsAndDragons and VampireTheMasquerade. Once part of HypercubeSuite and ChessersSuite, and is a permafrosh (by declaration of numerous people) and the legendary UberGuru of Biology. Co-creator of ChesSers and QuantumMafia. Was DM of the campaign that came to be known as the SagaOfClivesdale. Also original creator of GroupStoryOne and GroupStoryTwo and the concept GiggleSleep. Obeys NicksLawOfBreakfast. In EjWus absence, was the ItrFairy? (with less disastrous results) and often storytold for ItrGames. Never guilty of abusing the minor edit feature of FunWiki, especially not on the LordOfTheReam pages.

In his copious FreeTime, he has been known to write NickJohnsonsPoetry.

Classic roleplaying characters (in vaguely chronological order):

Whumpa: [My non-Caladania campaign during guest DMing] Ogre Cleric of death, loyal to Micah's character. If i recall correctly, got killed by a beholder mage (by design, cause i was DMing again). Famous for his great person skills, such as consuming a live kobold, or torturing the bastard who led us into a trap by ripping his arms off. Friend of the dwarf who consumed the Beaker of Plentiful Potions (see RolePlaying for story), whom he at one time tossed as a missile weapon into the mouth of a black dragon. Had proficiency in small humanoids. Also had an artistic bent, such as his skull sculptured out of some 2 billion copper coins (Don't ask).

Xexeskopoles: [Night Below with SteveHaas] Well, more appropriately Xexeskopolea, after knowingly putting on a girdle of masculinity/femininity. I don't know how i knew, but Steve said there was a girdle, and instantly i knew what it was and put it on, just part of the genius in playing a priest of Chaos. Famous for renaming all the NPCs ("Toaster sent us to find Gelatin"), and despite ineffectiveness outlived most of the party to perpetuate the false names to all the new comers. Carried a vial of perfume, 9 rotten eggs, 3lbs of salt, a broken mirror, 100 candles, 3 empty vials, a half bar of soap, and other oddities on his person as a matter of course (acquired an interesting collection of other things in his travels, like the cow skull he fixed a candle on and fashioned into a helmet). Personally responsible for the death of the priest of Law, mostly cause he conveniently found himself alone with the then trussed up law priest. It was an opportunity too good to refuse. Dual-classed to Chaos Mage at some point in time after leaving the campaign, and managed to ascend to godhood before turning his head into a grapefruit. (The fact that a chaos surge made all of his stats 20 probably helped). Maybe sometime in the future Steve will use Xexy as his god(dess) of chaos...

(The Gnome artillerist, whose name i will remember someday): [20th level campaign] Had a portable hole with a large siege cannon, among other numerous gadgets that he had contructed. Not to mention a huge leadership score, many personable skills (to get good contracts), and a pad of paper and a pencil in his belt. Undoubtably one of the most amusing characters in the party, mostly because i decided it was too easy to break the game, so i made a silly character instead.

Ling Mei: [LoriThomas and StephGrush Spring Break campaign] An oriental style warrior with a sense of honor (even if different from his compatriots) who almost beat an unarmed girl. Not taken in by the FuzzyBlueThings, which he hunted down and exterminated mercilessly. (They were evil i tell you).

Mwen Yddra: [West End SW, summer 2002 AIM] A scout and former assassin, not entirely sure why she's helping the imbeciles she ended up with, but at least the bounty hunter is competent, and maybe a little cute... Favors knives. *Vibrating* knives. That campaign should start up again... sometime...

Link creation for the story to be told: ThePineConeIncident


WhiteBoard:

"I have control of Drallt... and Drallt's arm" - WillShipley

"Just a sex" -RachelGabor

"We even have sex here somewhere..." -NickJohnson (its even more fun to not tell you the context)

"Yay, he fixed the WuZZle!" -SeleneTan

"I'm not horribly concerned, given my character's concept. Mindfucking Malkavians tends to be an exercise in masturbation." --EvilSouthie

"Dont do the 'the' thing to too many pages --JiBB


CategoryHomePage CategoryCrackWhore WikiWhore PI2i3570v1337 AncientMyth


Worst Nick ever.

In this vein, see nosnhoJkciN.


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