Patrick was and always will be a Sontag frosh, and a barbecue bitch, which he was but will not always be, and in fact no longer is. He is also no longer a barbecue baron. In his free time, he likes to masturbate horses. He gets paid. It's good money, if a bit of a strain on the wrists. Those horses don't masturbate themselves, you know. Has to do with the hoofs, as it turns out. Awkward business. We try not to talk about it. |