--------------------------- Reverse Psychology ~ A Moment in a Dorm Room ~ --------------------------- "How are you doing, Duo?" A part of him wanted to snarl that they weren't on a first name basis, but he was quite certain that that wouldn't go over so well with them, so he let it go with a gritting of his teeth that he passed off as a smile. Remember, he reminded himself. Give them what they want to hear, what they expect to hear. Surly, but cooperative. "Same as always, doc. Same as always." Dr. Browning nodded, not expecting to hear any differently. "How are you adjusting? Made any new friends?" While he could force down the sound of disdain, he had difficulty schooling his words into something pleasant. They weren't in kindergarten, for god's sake. "It ain't the first week anymore, doc. How many 'new friends' you think there'll be? I've already met anyone I care to meet, thanks." The base psychologist made a notation in his records. "Meeting people and connecting with them is an ongoing process, Duo, even inside of a fixed group. You have to understand that if you want to keep up." Keep up? No one had ever accused him of being slow. Duo calmly waited for his growl to subside before answering mildly. "A guy can't connect with everyone, doc, whether or not he meets 'em." "It's important that you try." "That's..." No, Duo, find a phrase other than something that means 'stupid'. "...like doing a puzzle. A piece fits, or it doesn't. No use jamming it in." Dr. Browning nodded again, and it pleased Duo to think that maybe there was a bit of an impressed tint to it. Not that Duo needed to impress this guy. Nope, didn't need his approval or anything. Just wanted to show him up. Or shut him up. Or throw him out a window. Whatever. The oblivious psychologist scrutinized his 'patient' for a few moments before continuing. "I hear your grades in some of your classes have improved." That wasn't a question, so Duo volunteered no information. Instead, he thought sourly to himself about how the school was in on this whole charade, and how they really didn't care about his academic performance. God, it was just like the Federation school he had had to attend. Even if he'd wanted to, he wouldn't have trusted the school staff or his classmates. Never knew who could be reporting back to the government. After waiting a suitable interval for Duo to answer, Dr. Browning chose to prompt him further. "Do you like to learn?" Duo nodded cautiously. He'd suppress that desire if it turned out to benefit these totalitarian freaks. "That's good, Duo. Studying can give you a useful focus for your energies and attention." Still no question, so still no answer, though Duo did have to stop himself from rolling his eyes. They thought he was actually settling down just because he was doing better on the tests. He'd have to thank Heero for that one. Of course, he also had to wonder if the shrinks were the one telling Yuy to study in the first place. He considered that during the expectant pause, then decided against it. It just didn't seem like him. Browning eventually moved on to another topic. "What do you think about your classmates?" That was a question he had asked before. Was Duo supposed to have an evolving opinion about them to match? They were still the sheep they always were. "Some of them are interesting," he answered with a shrug, reflecting that 'interesting' probably said something bad about him, but just not caring. "Some of them aren't. But they're just your average teenagers, yeah? I don't find the average teenager to be..." No, not 'worth my time'. "...representative of the rest of the population. So what does it really matter? I mean, you're trying to figure out how I'll get along with people in general, right?" "They're your peers, Duo." What was up with always saying his name? "No. They're not. We're just pretending they are. And even if I was just 'your average teenager', I wouldn't stay an average teenager, so even if they were my peers, they'd only be my peers for a few years. Hopefully after that, they won't be 'average teenagers' anymore." Though chances were, they'd still be annoying: old enough to think they understood the war, but young enough that they really had no clue. "Then whom do you consider your peers, Duo?" Why did he get the feeling that there was no right answer to that question? He went with the obvious. "Well... the other pilots, I guess." "Pilots?" "You know who I'm talking about." "Is that how you still see yourself? The group? As pilots?" Duo kept his scowl to a minimum. "What, did you expect me to list them by name? I know we don't have anything to pilot anymore." No need to rub it in, old man. "Then why do you still call yourself a pilot?" Being a Gundam pilot was a state of mind, and it had little to do with actually having a Gundam at one's disposal, but he hardly wanted to tell the doctor that. "What would have been better? The other... guys? You probably would have asked me to specify which guys, and then I'd probably be in the same boat I'm in now. You'll twist whatever I say to get to whatever you're digging around for, anyway." The doctor made another notation on his pad, no doubt about Duo's continuing hostility and distrust regarding psychologists. Duo didn't care. "What do you think of the others? Do you think they're adjusting?" "It's your job to figure that out, not mine." "I'd like to hear your opinion on the matter." In other words, the doctor wanted him to rat the others out? Duo didn't think so. "They're adjusting." "You said you considered them your peers. Do you consider them your friends as well?" He let a long pause play out, trying to figure out what the right answer to that was. It really kind of depended on the definition of 'friend'. At length, he shrugged carelessly. "Sure." "And your roommate?" "Heero? He's a pilot, and I just said the pilots were friends, didn't I?" "In the beginning, you called him, and I quote, 'just some weirdo I'm being forced to live with.' Do you think he's still a 'weirdo'?" Maybe less of one these days, but still well and truly Heero, whom he rather suspected would always deviate from the norm. Though if he was forced to render an opinion, he was beginning to consider his roommate as... not 'crazy' so much as merely 'strange'. "He's on your patient list, isn't he? What do you think?" That line never seemed to work on the shrinks, but he persisted in asking it anyway. The doctor gave his typical response. "I'd like to know what you think about the matter. I'd like to hear what he's like as a roommate, in that setting." An alert went off in Duo's head. "Why don't you ask him yourself?" "I'm asking you. Only you can tell me what he's like as a roommate." "He's a good roommate," he answered cautiously. "Stays out of my business." "So he's distant?" "Quiet," Duo countered, suspicious of how the discussion had turned to Heero. Granted, he was more than happy not to talk about himself anymore, but Duo Maxwell had never been a snitch. "Do you think he considers you to be a good roommate?" "I stay out of his business, too." It really wasn't difficult, given how little business Heero seemed to have. Then again, since Duo had given up trying to hang with the in-crowd, he didn't have much going on, either. It was, as Heero had predicted, a very simple relationship; they kept their hair out of the drain, and they got along just fine. "Is that what you consider friendship?" Alright, back to him. Duo wasn't pleased, but at least his hackles weren't being raised. Possibly he had been incorrect about the doctor's motives? "Friendship's sort of a hazy thing, isn't it?" he asked, stalling for time. Browning nodded amiably. "Yes, its definition differs from person to person, but all that matters right now is what it means to you." Duo found the most neutral things to say that he could, though in truth, that was all he thought there was. He certainly wouldn't call any of them 'buddies' or 'pals'... but there was something holding them together. "I know he's got my back, and I've got his. I know... I can count on him." To do what, precisely, he would leave unspecified. He could count on Heero to save the world. He could count on Heero to leave him alone when he wanted to be left alone, to snort disdainfully at the jocks when they tried to pick a fight, to point out impassively when he was being stupid, to not ask personal questions. He could count on Heero to be Heero. "And... sometimes, I guess he's got some useful things to say." "What sorts of things?" Those conversations were private, thank you very much. Especially since Duo found himself slightly weirded out thinking about what they had shared, little though it was. "Things. About our situation or whatever." He got the feeling that the two of them talked far more to each other than to these shrinks, so why couldn't they just stop with the psych evals already? "Useful, you say?" Duo didn't respond to the prompt, so the doctor was forced to press further. "He has made some... very reasonable comments?" Duo snorted. As if Heero was ever anything but reasonable. "What, you trying to imply that I'm usually less than reasonable?" "Not at all." Browning paused to consider his words carefully. "I was just concerned about the quality of advice or comments that you may have received from him." Duo outright laughed this time. "You worried he's a bad influence on me?" His derisive humor deserted him as another thought occurred to him. Was the doc just worried that Heero was a crazy fellow that shouldn't be doling out advice to anybody? Or maybe the doc was worried about any of them 'conspiring' together towards bad or unruly behavior. He scowled at the shrink. Unaware of Duo's sudden shift in disposition, the doctor continued his thread of concern. "Heero is a young man with his own set of issues." "Thought we were supposed to 'help' each other," Duo sneered. "Do you help him?" "Heh, you mean, do I make 'very reasonable comments'? Not compared to him, I bet." But if he didn't shake up Heero's world now and then, who would? "So you see him as the more reasonable of the two of you?" Duo let a dry look say 'duh' for him. "What do you think about that?" He withheld another sound of disdain. The doctor seemed to think that was better than asking how it made him feel, which was admittedly a correct assessment of the situation, but it didn't mean that Duo would be any more inclined to answer with a helpful answer. "I don't think anything about that." "You must think something," Browning pointed out with a skeptical look. "So he's more reasonable than I am sometimes. Why should that be a big deal?" He couldn't have said whether being reasonable was a good thing or a bad thing. It sort of depended on the situation. "How well are you sleeping these days?" Interesting change in topic. "I get all I need." Luckily, he'd never needed much. "Nothing keeping you up at night? Nightmares? Dreams? Roommate?" "Nope. Fine, thanks." None of those things really interfered with his ability to get enough sleep. Except for the roommate, he'd been dealing with those things for quite a while. He'd have been in quite a bit of trouble if he hadn't learned to work around them by now. Browning's expression showed some resignation, as if he knew it wasn't true, but also that he wouldn't get anything else out of the pilot. He moved on again. Maybe he might possibly be able to startle some answers out of the boy. "You said a few weeks ago that you were worried when you found Heero passed out in your room. Are you worried that it might happen again?" Duo frowned faintly. He'd only said he was worried because he imagined it would have been worse to have said that he hadn't been worried. He knew it would come back and haunt him. Heero had been passed out in their room, for golly's sake. Of course he hadn't acted as if that happened every day. "I expect Heero to be considerate enough not to let it happen again." An ambiguous answer. "Considerate? You feel put upon that this happened to you? Do you resent it?" God, didn't this guy understand that sometimes a turn of phrase was just a turn of phrase? "The guy fucking passed out because the goddamn Zero system was fucking with his head. You really think I 'resent' that?" "He could have reported his symptoms earlier, and perhaps avoided passing out." Well, yeah, but none of them was particularly eager to have his head examined by the authorities any more than necessary, so he couldn't in good conscience hold Heero's silence against him. If there was anything to blame, it was Zero, haunting from its grave. How he hated that thing. "Yeah, and he could have avoided using the Zero system, too, and avoided the whole fucking mess. Whoopee. I'm not impressed by your 'coulda's." "For all you know, he could still be suffering from symptoms, and not telling you, just as before. It doesn't worry you that you might not know something this important until it's too late?" Heero had learned his lesson, hadn't he? From what Duo could tell, his roommate had been rather unexpectedly candid in his self-assessment during the early stages of his recovery. Even in the early stages of his affliction, he had been strangely open about the occasional headache, and on that day they finally brought him in, he had been quite willing to go. Duo chose to think that Heero would have said something sooner if he'd known exactly what was causing his problems, and now that he knew, he wouldn't ignore it again. "If he hasn't said anything lately, I trust it's because there's been nothing to say." "He's showed no signs of erratic behavior? Headaches? Fatigue? Strange decisions?" It took a few seconds, but it finally clicked what the doctor was getting at. "No," Duo answered flatly, and thereafter refused to say anything more. Anything remotely helpful or mildly cooperative, at least. ************ "I can't fucking believe it!" Duo hissed at the others once their 'escorts' had sufficiently distanced themselves from their charges. "Did they do the same thing to you guys, too?" Quatre looked faintly alarmed. "Do what?" "Did they try--" He cut himself off suddenly, watching as Heero was shepherded back to their flock. Heero had been taken away first because of the extra battery of tests they performed on him, but he still returned last. Duo gave him a quick visual inspection. "You good?" A question that could have meant anything, really. Heero wasn't particularly fond of those, but he was beginning to accept their utility. He shrugged, wielding his own multi-purpose action. "Good as ever." "They didn't... they didn't do anything weird or anything?" "No. Did you expect them to?" Duo turned back to the rest of the group. "They normally try and get you to talk about the rest of us, right?" A few nods. "Any particular interest in Heero this time?" Some consideration, followed by the shaking of a few heads. He indulged in a short growl. Even though that was a good thing, he still hated being targeted. "Was for me. Bastards were trying to get me to tell them if he was still in some 'altered state' from Zero." He made a twirly gesture in the air with his finger. Trowa's eyes shifted to Heero for a moment. "Is he?" "No!" Duo snapped, before a brief pang of uncertainty struck him. His eyes also homed in on his roommate. "Are you?" Heero's bland expression twitched minutely. "No. Not that I'm aware of." Reassuring, but only barely. "Well, good! Geez, I don't know how they expect us to 'help each other' if they're always expecting us to rat each other out." Another wave of uncertainty passed over him. "You guys *are* keeping your mouths shut, right?" Trowa looked at him. Heero Looked at him. Wufei glared at him with a muttered, 'Of course!' and Quatre reassured him with a firm 'Of course!' Duo frowned apologetically at his boots for a couple of seconds. "Sorry. Guess those shrinks can really do a number on you sometimes. Come on," he said, jerking his head in the direction of the exit. "Let's blow this joint." He tried not to think of any explosions when he said it. Heero fell into step with him as they left the building. "Did you give them grief over it?" "Hell, yeah. You can bet I wasn't very cooperative after that." He had expected as much. "That only reinforces their impression of you." "Which impression is that?" "You're rebellious." "We're all rebellious. What can you expect out of rebels?" Heero inclined his head slightly in recognition of the point. "But you're more rebellious than the rest of us. At least, according to them." "Ooh, did you sneak a peek at our case files?" He looked forward to that with eager anticipation, although he might have wished that he had been the lucky one to score the files. Heero shook his head. "No. But they don't seem to think I can hear anything when I'm in their machines. You shouldn't make things harder on yourself." Duo made a sound of disgust. "I know what their game is, and I've no interest in playing. Geez, you want me to rat on you or what?" "You know what their game is, but there's no reason to let them know that you know." He opened his mouth to retort, then shut it thoughtfully. Dammit, there he was, forgetting to be crafty and sly and sneaky and wily again. Argh, this whole peace thing was just as much a mindfuck as the goddamn shrinks. _________________________________________ This piece of fiction is the intellectual property of the little turnip that could. The basis for this fic, i.e. Gundam Wing, Kyuuketsuki Miyu, et al., is the property of someone else. The author can be con- tacted at jchew at myrealbox.com. This has been an entirely automated message. http://www.cs.hmc.edu/~jchew/misc/gw.html last modified : 11/30/2004 17:44:10 PST