---------------------
Of Showers and Cotton
~ A Moment of Haven ~
---------------------
	In the time it had taken him to transfer the laundry from the 
washer to the dryer, he had sort of expected Heero to have already 
gotten into the shower.  Heero was rarely ever a slouch about things, 
and he was such a stickler for matters of personal hygiene.

	And yet there he was when Duo passed by the bathroom, standing 
there staring into the bathtub stall, still dressed in his running 
shorts and tanktop.

	"Uh, problem here?" Duo asked, leaning against the door jamb.

	Heero didn't turn around as he responded.  "How do people have 
sex in the shower?"

	Duo slipped off the door frame and caught himself before he 
fell.  "Pardon?" he choked out.

	"Seriously," his partner answered gesturing at their 
bathtub/shower.  They didn't have an actual shower stall, but he was able 
to imagine one pretty easily.  He wondered if having rubber duckies on 
the shower curtain would kill the mood.  "Obviously they'd have to be 
standing."

	"Uh... yeah..."  Duo didn't really know what else to say, though 
he supposed that they could theoretically be sitting.  He might have 
pointed it out under other circumstances, but he didn't think he wanted 
to encourage Heero right now.

	"They'd have to use the wall for support," Heero continued, 
utterly unfazed.  "Wouldn't the tile be really cold against one's back?  
Even accounting for a hot water spray.  The tiles just don't soak up 
that much heat."

	"Well... maybe they don't have tiled walls?"

	"Hmm.  Maybe.  But fiberglass walls probably wouldn't offer as 
much support."

	"It, uh, doesn't have to be *firm* support...  As long as it 
doesn't collapse."  He had a sudden flash of two people he vaguely 
recognized as himself and Heero having sex against a shower door and 
having it snap open at a very inopportune moment.  He winced even as he 
flushed.

	Heero visualized the strength of fiberglass walls and accepted 
the theory, though he doubted that most people considered the material 
of their shower walls before engaging in conjugal relations within.  He 
moved on to his next point anyway.  "So if the person with the cold back 
is standing, he'd probably have to have at least one leg up to provide 
access, right?  Which would be rather uncomfortable, I'd imagine.  If he 
had any of his legs up, then his partner would probably have to help 
hold them up if they were going at it for any length of time.  Even so, 
with one leg up, wouldn't you start losing circulation, or get a cramp?  
And if his partner is supporting all of his weight?  While the force 
exerted to push his back against the wall would partially balance out 
the force in the downward direction, it would probably get pretty tiring 
after a short while, wouldn't it?"

	"...Assuming that the average joe doesn't have the strength and 
endurance to pilot a Gundam during a really long battle?  Uh, yeah, 
probably."  What the hell kind of porn flicks had Heero been watching 
behind his back?

	"And speaking of force, I don't think the water would do nearly 
enough to ease the friction between skin and wall.  Assuming they're 
doing things vigorously, I think that would definitely chafe after a 
while."

	"Umm... that's nice."

	"And the safety issues," Heero went on, finally turning around 
to look at his partner.  To Duo's dismay, he found Heero's face quite 
serious.  "What if one of them slipped and fell?  When you're having 
sex, I doubt you really have enough presence of mind to consider the 
proper distribution of weight, or any other physics matter, and if you 
find that you really can still think about those things, then you're 
probably not enjoying yourself.  You could end up with a potentially 
life-threatening head injury."

	"Well, maybe they... wear helmets!  I don't know!  Why are we 
talking about this, Heero?"  Duo forestalled him with the frantic waving 
of both his hands.  "No, wait, I don't really want to know.  You're 
thinking way too hard about this.  Besides, maybe they do it from the 
back."

	A simple solution that hadn't occurred to Heero.  He mulled over 
that for a second.  "Possibly.  ...Isn't that rather impersonal?  All 
you'd really get is a close-up view of the grout."

	Duo threw up his hands in exasperation.  "If a guy's getting 
nailed against the locker room shower wall, I really doubt he cares 
about it being a personal experience!"

	Heero frowned.  "Hmm.  I suppose.  Do me a favor?"  Duo's eyes 
widened.  He didn't really want to hear it, but Heero continued anyway.  
"Never nail me to a locker room shower wall."

	He let out the breath he'd been holding.  On the list of weird 
things Heero could have asked, that wasn't up there among the worst 
offenders.  "Yeah.  Sure, okay.  I'll add it to my list of do's and 
don'ts."  When the hell were they ever in a locker room shower anyway?

	Heero nodded in apparent satisfaction.  "Thank you."

	Duo snorted in response.  "Whatever.  Now hurry up and shower.  
Ami will be by soon."  He turned to go, but paused before he left 
completely and threw his final parting words over his shoulder.  "And 
don't think any weird thoughts in there!"

	He knew they agreed to talk openly about any concerns they might 
have about sexual relations since before was definitely better than 
during, but this was ridiculous.  Helpful in some small way in defining 
their boundaries, but still ridiculous.

                              ************

	Heero entered the living room, hands empty.  "Hey," Duo called 
out with a grin, glancing away from the laptop monitor off of which Ami 
was currently working.  "Done indulging your underwear fetish?"

	"My clean cotton fetish, you mean."  There was something very 
pleasant about clothes fresh out of the dryer, something clean, warm, 
fresh and fluffy.  It seemed almost a shame to break the heap down into 
neat, folded stacks, but on the other hand, Heero got a kick out of 
seeing things organized and in their place, too.  The clothes could be 
clean, warm, fresh and fluffy inside their drawers just as well.  It was 
simply coincidence that the load of white laundry consisted of mostly 
socks and underwear.

	"What's a fetish?" Ami piped up from her place on the floor 
between the sofa and the coffee table.

	Heero's lips twitched.  Duo blinked at him, then glanced over to 
Ami, hoping she hadn't just asked that.  She blinked expectantly back at 
him.  He opened his mouth to say something, but nothing came to mind, so 
he turned back to Heero.

	"Don't look at me," his housemate calmly refused.  "You brought 
it up."

	"But you're the one that answers these kinds of things!"  This 
was not a conversation he wanted getting back to the poor girl's mother.

	"I'm not cleaning up your mess."  Heero moseyed over to the sofa 
next to him and leaned back casually against the cushions, obviously 
waiting for events to play out.

	Duo rewarded him with a slap on his shoulder.  "But if I hold 
out long enough, you'll feel bad and cave in eventually."

	Heero smirked.  "I'd make you pay for it."

	"Does it have to do with sex?" Ami asked, displeased with being 
ignored.  If they wouldn't answer, she'd have to come to her own 
conclusions, and in her experience, most of the things that adults 
didn't want to talk about had to do with sex.  "...What does laundry 
have to do with sex?"

	Silence.  Heero decided to move things along.  He turned 
sideways in his seat and looked expectantly at his partner.  "Well, 
Duo?"

	Duo blew a raspberry at him.  "You're not helping, Heero."

	"Sure I am."

	"You're not helping *me*, Heero!"

	Well, how would the girl feel if they were both sided against 
her?  Heero sure didn't want to be the one to explain things.  "You 
started it."

	Sure, Duo had no one to blame but himself, but that didn't mean 
that Heero had to go and make things difficult.  Not that there was 
really an easy way out of this situation.  If he didn't answer, Ami 
would kick him in the shins eventually and pout at him.  Which still 
probably wouldn't make him any more inclined to answer.  "You like her 
better!"

	'I do not' was not the proper response to the accusation when 
still in the presence of said girl, who was indeed watching the 
proceedings with a sharp, exasperated, amused expression.  It was fun 
watching grown-ups get embarrassed.  "She has the right of it in this 
case."

	"You'd answer her better.  This is your job.  You take care of 
these things.  She likes you better."  Now he was just saying whatever 
he could to get out of his jam.

	"You have to stop with this 'she likes you better' thing, Duo."  
They were just playing around, but he didn't like that Duo had that idea 
in his head.

	"It's true!  She likes you best.  Everyone likes you best!  
You're smart and wise and reliable and--"  He choked himself off 
suddenly, just as soon as he recognized a sneer creeping into his tone, 
or maybe it was jealousy.  He'd meant it to be fun, a listing of Heero's 
positive traits, a compliment, even.  He got wide-eyed and stunned when 
he realized what it had turned out to be.

	Heero got a little wide-eyed, too.  A few seconds later, without 
words, without regard for their audience, he wrapped his arms around Duo 
in an embrace from the side, his chin coming to rest upon Duo's 
shoulder.  He stayed silently comforting for the space of several 
breaths before he murmured quietly near Duo's ear.  "What are you doing, 
Duo?"

	"I don't know, Heero," Duo murmured back, one hand rising slowly 
to grasp the arm across his chest.  Something just came out of hiding 
and ambushed him.

	"I thought you guys were supposed to be a secret," Ami ventured, 
uncertain what was going on.  Of course, she already knew the secret, 
but that was beside the point.  Just because she knew, didn't mean that 
they were supposed to get all kissy in front of her.  Not that they were 
being kissy.  If they were, she knew what the proper response to that 
was: ewwww.

	"It's not a secret that people just need a hug sometimes," Heero 
advised her softly.

	She stared at them critically for a couple of moments before she 
threw her arms around Duo as well, surprising and warming them both.  
Heero let her stay for a while before he tipped his head down to look 
towards her.  "Ami, could you go--"  He cast about for a legitimate 
excuse to send her out of the room, but found nothing.  "--just give us 
a few minutes?"

	Having looked up at the sound of her name, she considered him 
solemnly before nodding, uncurling herself from the others, and heading 
towards the kitchen, confidence in her step.  Something was wrong with 
Duo, but Heero would fix it.  Heero-niichan could fix anything.  And 
besides, he didn't give her some fake reason to leave the room.  That 
was neat.

	When she was gone, Heero let out a small puff of breath.  
"Duo..."

	Duo heaved a real sigh.  "Don't ask, Heero.  Just don't ask.  I 
don't know.  I really don't."

	"I like you best," Heero reminded him, dropping a kiss on Duo's 
shoulder.  "You're smart, too, and wise and reliable and probably 
everything else that was about to tumble out of that mouth of yours."

	Duo smiled tiredly at him.  "You sure?"

	"Of course.  I'm smart and wise and reliable, remember?  Trust 
me on this one.  You're..."  So many ways to end that sentence.  
Instead, he chose a way he knew Duo couldn't complain about and loosened 
the embrace enough to land his lips on Duo's cheek and kiss his way 
towards the mouth.  Duo was very cooperative, but they were mindful of 
the little girl in the next room, so they were reduced to snuggling soon 
after.

	Keenly aware of Heero's tendencies, Duo spoke up as soon as the 
thought occurred to him.  Such things were best nipped in the bud.  
"Don't even start, Yuy."

	Heero shifted.  "Hm?"

	"Don't even start thinking about finding some way to take 
responsibility for this somehow.  This has nothing to do with you, 
understand?  My problem, not yours."

	"Your problems are my problems."

	"No, they're not," Duo responded firmly.  "Not all of them.  
This one's inside *my* head.  My problem, got it?"

	Heero didn't agree, but he didn't argue, either.  He did 
eventually say something, though.  "Watch your tongue next time."

	"Bah.  You said it, too.  Hell, she probably picked it up from 
you, not me.  She--"

	"Duo.  Stop."

	He realized where he was going with that and gave himself a 
mental slap on the wrist.  The sound he made was somewhere between 
exasperation and disgust.  "Damn, that's insidious.  I always thought 
that was a joke, too.  When the hell did I get so...?"

	Heero gave him a squeeze before murmuring a warning against his 
shoulder.  "Don't let her know."

	"Oh, hell no."  He couldn't do that to a kid.

	When Ami poked her head out of the kitchen, she found them in 
much the same position that she left them in.  Heero caught her eye and 
nodded that it was alright for her to come back, and she crept back to 
their side with hesitance in her step.

	Duo mustered up a rueful grin for her.  "Hey, squirt.  Sorry 
'bout that."

	She shuffled awkwardly from one foot to another for a moment 
before she shook her head vigorously enough to send her hair flying.  
"I'm sorry, Duo!" she blurted out.  Her sabbatical in the kitchen had 
left her some time to think.  "I'm sorry I asked!  You don't have to 
answer!"

	He had a moment of stricken panic before he reached out and 
tugged her into another tight hug.  "No, no, Ami.  This isn't your 
fault, kiddo.  Me being stupid has nothing to do with you.  Nothing.  
Not your fault at all.  Never, ever hesitate to ask us something, you 
hear?  I'm the one that's sorry.  I'm sorry I got all weird.  I'm sorry 
I worried you."  Heero kissed his shoulder again in silent comfort.

	Ami sniffled against Duo's shirt before looking up with wide 
brown eyes.  "I like you, too, Duo.  I like you both the bestest!  
You're my favoritest people in the whole wide world!  'Cept for Mom, 
maybe."

	Duo smiled, ruffling her bangs fondly.  "Glad to hear it, kiddo.  
You ain't half bad yourself."

	She sniffed again.  "Okay... But you don't hafta answer anyway."

	He might have sighed in relief for dodging that bullet, but 
after putting the kid through the wringer, she kinda deserved it now.  
Completely clueless as to where to start, he turned to Heero for help, 
ready to wield the puppy eyes if he had to.

	Heero sighed softly, and not in relief.  "A fetish is... some 
little thing that a person has some strange fascination for."

	She frowned through another sniffle, the joy of learning a new 
word overcoming her worry.  "So does it have anything to do with sex or 
not?"

	Duo muffled a cough, but Heero caught it anyway, and shot him a 
look that clearly informed him that he had better be on his best 
behavior, or else Heero wouldn't cover for him anymore.  Once Duo had 
settled down, Heero continued.  "Usually."

	"I don't get it."

	And thank all the gods for that.  "You don't have to.  I don't 
get it a lot, either."  Sort of like sex in the shower.  "Do you 
understand the non-sex part of it?"

	She nodded.

	"Then that's good enough.  Now do us a favor and don't use the 
word for a few more years, okay?  Little girls shouldn't know words like 
'fetish'."

	She nodded again, always happy to oblige her niichan.



_________________________________________
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The basis for this fic, i.e. Gundam Wing, 
Kyuuketsuki Miyu, et al., is the property 
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has been an entirely automated message.
http://www.cs.hmc.edu/~jchew/misc/gw.html

last modified : 12/6/2004 00:14:45 PST