Yes, it's that time once again! The 3 charter members of SporkYou have been thrown together by a hum paper, a CS assignment, and a bag of Ruffles Zesty Sour Cream and Onion potato chips! What, you may ask, does this mean to the common, ordinary laymen such as those of you staring blankly at your computer screens? It means.... CHAOS!!!!

Yes, that's right! Chaos is running rampant through the libra complex!! Run for cover!!! Women and bio majors first!

We've got something to say. And as soon as we figure out what it is, we'll be sure to say it.

So, first order of business. These potato chips are nasty. I move that Spock get something better for next time we're going to be locked down here in the land of evilness.

<SPORK YOU MELA! I think the potato chips are good. Do you want the shoe ninja to return?! Huh? HUH?!!>


<Bwa ha ha. Stupid Gaijin.>

Oh, no!! Silly Japanese insults!!! I'm sooooo scared!!! This coming from the person with potato chip breath.

<<<Note: Mela is currently wearing only *one* shoe. The other has just been stolen by the shoe ninja. Mela will perhaps be more careful with her words in the future. >>>

<<<Note: My foot is freaking cold!!!>>>

<<<Note: Tamara just sustained serious injury in honorable battle with the shoe ninja. >>>

<<<Note: The shoe has returned safely to the hands (er...foot) of it's owner. All is well. >>>

But the potato chips still suck!!!

And so they shall forevermore.

It occurs to the twisted, diabolical mind of the one typing this, that "forevermore" is a very odd word. I mean, it's three words! For ever more. Or two... Forever more. But not For evermore, that's just silly. And not For moreever, though that would certainly be a nice change. And not More everfore, either. What's up with that???

Tamara is asleep. She'd better watch out, there are gremlins in the floorboards!

>> Look You are in a brightly lit room. Computers line the walls, and 3 frosh sit in a corner in front of monitors. A random person sits opposite the room, attempting to work. You see: a book, skanky potato chips, a calculator. Exits: W

>> Get all You take: a book, skanky potato chips, a calculator. The door opens.

>> Look You are in a brightly lit room. Computers line the walls, and 2 frosh sit in a corner in front of monitors. A random person sits opposite the room, attempting to work. Exits: W

>> W You go west.

>> Look You are in a hallway. Exits: N, S, E, W

>> S You are in a dimly lit lobby. To the west, there are 3 closed doors. To the east, the exits. North and south of you are two never-ending hallways. You see: a drinking fountain, a shoe. Exits: N, S, E, W

>> Take shoe You get the shoe. You have: a book, skanky potato chips, a calculator, a shoe.

>> Take drinking fountain You can't have it.

You hear a scream!!!!

The lights go out.

>> Look You are in a large, darkened lobby. There appears to be an exit to the east. You can just barely make out doorways to the west. You see: a drinking fountain. Exits: E, W

>> W You enter a large lecture hall. Sleeping in several of the seats are some insane frosh. To the far east you can make out a screen of some sort. You see: a banana, a frosh. Exits: E, W

>>Take banana You take the banana. You have: a book, skanky potato chips, a calculator, a shoe, a banana.

>> Take frosh You can't have it.

>> Please??? Well, it *is* after the frosh chem test. OK, you can have it. No! No! Not in the building!!!

>> W You move closer to the screen, and you can make out a strange-looking man near the front of the room. You see: a cabinet, a prof. Exits: E, W

>> Look at man He's a CS prof. Oh...oh no. No. NO!!!!

It's Hodas!!!!

>> Run You run away.

>> Look You are in a classroom.

The door opens.

"You!!" Hodas begins to charge.

>> Attack

You throw a shoe. You missed. Hodas throws a fireball Your skanky potato chips are on fire!!

>> Read book

What luck! You've picked up a book that has the secret to vanquishing even the evils of this nefarious professor! You read quickly.

Hodas encases you in a wall of ice.

I guess even "How to defeat CS profs with sadistic tendencies" doesn't work to get rid of your foe when you have stupidly already used your frosh!! Don't you know that only a frosh can defeat Hodas???

Your skin is beginning to go numb. You summon an avatar. Hodas' arms are gnawed off! Hodas picks up a keyboard and begins to type. You begin to whine. Hodas casts light heal.

>> Kill Hodas

You summon a daemon. Hodas is in poor condition. Hodas swings, misses.

>> Hodas must pay!!!!

You swing the calculator with a strength you never knew you had!!

Hodas is dead. Experience: 42 skanky potato chips: taken local newspaper: taken mac paraphenalia: not taken

>> Look You are in a classroom. On the floor is a mangled CS prof. Exits: E, W

>> W

You leave the classroom. And somehow, despite the construction of the building, are outside!

>>Look You see the sunlight streaming through the leaves of the trees in the forest. Off to the far north is a mountain. The elven camp is to the south. No, wait...wrong game.


Quit without saving? (y/n) Y

C:\Games> deltree C:\games\frosh All files in the specified directory will be deleted. Continue? (y/n) Y Directory C:\games\frosh has been deleted.

C:\Games> exit

<<<<Note: OK, I take blame for the whole thing. I'm really very sorry about sending out this email. No, wait, I'm not. Unfortunately, one of my compatriots is asleep on the floor of AC, and the other is surfing the net, so they can't apologize as well. Guess you can just thank them later! ~~~Pamela "yes, it's been awhile since I've gotten to use dos 6.0, please excuse the odd commands">>>>

Well, that about wraps it up for Random Froshie Thoughts today (mostly because I'm tired of typing!) We hope you've enjoyed this temporary escape from reality/sanity/sleep. Send all flames to prettig@hmc.edu. Until next time....

SporkYou (Miguel, Spock, and the not-so-bad-really-Frosh)

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Last edited May 24, 2001 17:15 (diff)