[parents getting tour of physics department from ProfessorTownsend, in modern lab]
ProfessorLyzenga: We get everyone down into the lab, even the theorists.
ProfessorTownsend: Yeah, and sometimes even Jaron!

pants is a Junior. He is sometimes known as Jazor "Jaron" Kent-Dobias (パンツ). Though he lives in EastDorm, the little time he does spend sleeping is done around. As of fall 2012 he is living in SontagDorm with JackMa and BradJensen and DietrichLangenbach and those other people.

Facts

These are facts which have special relevance to the life of pants.

Is a PhysicsMajor and eats it, too.
Has a PurityScore of 30.6%.
Has a WhedonNumber of 4.
Has a strong PatriNumber of 4.
Has a weak PatriNumber of 3.
A past KeeperOfTheWiki.
May be associated with WOPR, but probably not.
Currently serves as both LoungeNazi and Lounge Sensitivity Officer.
Knows HowToBeAsAwesomeAsPants.
A resident of OctothorpeHMC since December 2009.
Jaron Still Owns Schmack as of May 2017

Random Facts

These things were all random one-liners people added to this page and are now a bulleted list.

Buys his own lunch meat and then beats it. What a weird guy.
Evidence suggests that he may in fact be Garret Wong wearing Pants' skin.
He will generalize your major as a point mass above an infinite plane of uniform change.
- He will then use a botnet to create a hashtable of all possible majors and use it to find yours
He is a co-founder of JP, along with JohnPeebles. Currently looking for investors.
At 14:30 on October 18, 2010, was observed in East Lounge NOT wearing a tie.
At 02:30 on November 9, 2012, was observed in East Lounge asleep.
- Tradition mandates that frosh sleeping in East Lounge have Stumpy placed atop them.
On 10/27/2010, wore women's clothing in a drag competition (the world will never forget).
Likes wearing pink panties (パンツ) around the lounge while making strong advances on JacobPeacock.
Began the regular calling of JustinsITRMovie.
Is known to call FMMs with impeccable taste.
Immersed his phone in coffee 13 December 2012 c.1120. Drank the coffee.
Voted "Dorm Alcoholic" during Eastmas 2011.
Voted "Dorm Drugs are Good for Life" during Eastmas 2012.

Housing History

pants usually lives somewhere. Here are those places.

Fall-Spring 2010-2011
Roomed in Atwood 226 MarkMann?. Suite was populated by MarkEllis?, EmilySnyder?, AnneClark, MariaMorabe, JackieOlmos?-Silverman, BonnieDavidson?, and LaurenNishoku?. Lovingly labelled SuiteBondage? by a subset of its residents.

Summer 2011
Roomed in Linde 145 by himself. Suite was populated by DavidLingenbrink, MattMcDermott, RebeccaThomas, KatyAnderson, and NicoleYu?.

Fall 2011
Roomed in East 103 with JackMa. Suite was populated by CarloVaccari? and CoreyLoescher. Referred to as TimeCube by JackMa and pants.

Spring 2012
Roomed in East 103 by himself. During this time, the suite become SingleDouble suite, occupied by only Carlo and pants.

Summer 2012
Roomed in Sontag 204D with JakeLow. Suite was populated by KatyAnderson and MeganWheeler.

Fall-Spring 2012-2013
Roomed in Sontag 204D with JackMa. Suite was populated by DietrichLangenbach and BradJensen. Called SuiteNames? (SuitePotatoVodka?) by its occupants.

Fall-Spring 2013-2014
Roomed in Sontag 208B by himself. Suite was populated by GarrettWong?, SteveIbanez?, and FroshToBeDetermined. Called Sueder (Suite Ceder).

Quotes

pants occasionally says things. Someone decided to put at least one of them on this wiki.

See LoungeQuotes

"Nice shoes, ProfDuron. Want to have sex?"

"That's why I like cheap electronics. I don't have to worry about it. Take this phone. This phone can take anything." **proceeds to drop phone into coffee mug** "Oh shit, its in the coffee."

Classes Taken

pants has taken a few classes. Feel free to talk to him about any of them.

Fall 2010

 CHEM 023E HM: Energetics
 CHEM 023S HM: Structure
 CSCI 005  HM: Introduction to Computer Science
 MATH 015  HM: Art & Application of Calculus
 MATH 025G HM: Calculus and Linear Algebra
 MUS  084  HM: Jazz Improvisation
 PHYS 022  HM: Physics Laboratory
 PHYS 023  HM: Special Relativity
 WRIT 001  HM: Introduction to Academic Writing

Spring 2011

 BIOL 052  HM: Introduction to Biology
 CHEM 023D HM: Dynamics
 CHEM 024  HM: Chemistry Laboratory
 CSCI 189  HM: Programming Practicum
 HSA  010  HM: Critical Inquiry: Political Analysis
 MATH 035  HM: Probability and Statistics
 MATH 045  HM: Introduction to Differential Equations
 PE   046  HM: Floor Hockey
 PHYS 024A HM: Mechanics & Wave Motion
 PHYS 032  HM: Gravitation

Summer 2011

 MATH 060  HM: Multivariable Calculus
 MATH 065  HM: Differential Equations and Linear Algebra II

Fall 2011

 CL   057  HM: Choice Lab: What Makes Things Tick?
 ENGL 135  SC: The Satirical Imagination
 ENGR 059  HM: Introduction to Engineering Systems
 MATH 055  HM: Discrete Mathematics
 PHYS 051  HM: Electromagnetic Theory & Optics
 PHYS 111  HM: Theoretical Mechanics

Spring 2012

 ECON 053  HM: Principles of Macroeconomics
 HIST 132E CM: European Intellectual History
 MATH 115  HM: Fourier Series and Boundary Value Problems
 MATH 131  HM: Mathematical Analysis I
 PHYS 052  HM: Quantum Physics
 PHYS 054  HM: Modern Physics Laboratory
 PHYS 174  HM: Biolocomotion
 PHYS 196  HM: Physics Colloquium

Fall 2012

 LIT  179D HM: Special Topics in Literature: Medieval/Renaissance? Romance
 MATH 142  HM: Differential Geometry
 MATH 171  HM: Abstract Algebra
 MS   179C HM: Special Topics in Media Studies: Modern China Through the Lens
 PE   058  HM: Team Sports
 PHYS 117  HM: Statistical Mechanics and Thermodynamics
 PHYS 131  HM: Electromagnetic Fields
 PHYS 196  HM: Physics Colloquium

Spring 2013

 LIT  110  HM: Shakespeare
 MATH 196  HM: Independent Study in Mathematics
 PHYS 116  HM: Quantum Mechanics
 PHYS 134  HM: Optics Laboratory
 PHYS 154  HM: Fields & Waves
 PHYS 170  HM: Computational Methods in Physics
 PHYS 172  HM: General Relativity and Cosmology
 PHYS 196  HM: Physics Colloquium

Fall 2013

 ART  135  SC: Typography and the Book Arts
 HIST 179E HM: History of Modern Physics / Special Topics in History
 MATH 132  HM: Mathematical Analysis II
 PE   031  JP: Turbo Kick-Boxing
 PHYS 161  HM: Topics in Quantum Theory
 PHYS 195  HM: Physics Colloquium
 PHYS 191  HM: Research in Physics
 PHYS 196  HM: Readings in Physics

Jobs

pants scrapes by as a poor physics major. To do this, he has worked a couple jobs.

Current Jobs

AE Physics Tutor
CS Staff
CCMS Software Lab Tutor
Physics 18 Tutor

Past Jobs

Mechanics Grader
CS Consultant
Core Math Grader
Theoretical Mechanics Grader
Physics Researcher

Hobbies

pants is trying to make this page into a dating profile.

See HowToBeAsAwesomeAsPants

Editing FunWiki.
Mixing drinks.
Drinking drinks.
Reading physics books.
Adding sentences explaining his FunWiki sections.
Riding a huge unicycle.
Drawing police brutality.
Interrogation.
Angering people on mailing lists.
Unnecessarily typesetting things in LaTeX.
Upgrading Perl.

Poetry

Incantation of Caffeination

To be recited while pressing the french press, the moka fills, etc.

 Oh ghost of Erdős, hear my desperate plea;
 that mine own mind enriched by coffee be
 and by that drinking, with its tender kiss,
 become machine that thine own conscious is.
 Dispel the sleep which vies to own my brain,
 and warm throughout the blood which fills my veins,
 lest maths, with beauty, do not this night fill
 and lack of thought doth finally slay my will.
 But should you fail and thought doth truly lack,
 I'll soon prepare the poetry for crack.

KissiWebNeighbors:

CategoryHomePage | HowToBeAsAwesomeAsPants

(redirected from Pants)

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